It’s easy to be upset about anything. Whenever we browse social media or watch the news, or someone bothers us at work, we can get bitter or, worse, feel sad and anxious. It’s easy to do, to be mad or sad or feel rage. Why? Why are these feelings the default when something we perceive as unfavorable happens to us or when we learn about something we don’t like? In most cases, the emotions usually go away if you let some time and space in between these events.
For example, when writing code, I might expect something to work, but it doesn’t always happen. Sometimes I spend more time than expected to find a problem or come up with a solution. These coding problems usually upset me, or at the least, it bothers me. It makes me not like my work as much. Finally, after many years of trial and error, I think I can share something that often works for me.
When I run into a situation where I start feeling upset or uncomfortable, I try to put some space between me and that thing. I do this by walking away from my computer, turning off the TV, putting my phone away, etc. The idea is to put some space or time between you and the source of the negative feeling. I understand that this is only possible for some things, but it helps me with the things I can control, like my work or my time experience while watching the news or browsing social media.
Time and space cure it all. It sounds cliche, but it is true. How often have you felt upset about something or someone, and then after a while, that feeling goes away or diminishes with time? How often do you feel upset about something, and then hours or days later, you don’t even remember it? This feeling is more common than you might think.
Our feelings aren’t permanent nothing is. Once you understand this, you’d be able to balance your feelings better, be in control, and you might even find that since nothing is permanent, worrying or being upset about something is nonsense. Of course, this is easier said than done, but some degree of this is possible if you try.
I have also noticed that when I am upset, people around me behave differently, they don’t like it, and they might even become upset. It is like a virus, and it is contagious. The same can be said about a smile or someone who expresses contentment. If you are with someone who smiles, you’d probably smile too.
There you have it. I hope it works for you. The above is not scientific advice or anything like that. Just sharing my experiences and how I’ve been able to stay calm and relaxed even when people think I should be upset. It doesn’t always work. I am a work in progress and will always be. So I am OK with that.
I hope you have a great day!